Answer

Debate over Attachment Discussion

            I believe that parenting is the hardest job in the world. I am not a parent, but I am around many parents such as my own and family friends and I can see that it is no walk in the park. Parenting requires, patience, love, guidance, and support (both emotionally and financially). I also think that everyone has a very different approach to parenting which is absolutely acceptable and understandable. Although, no matter the style of parenting, I believe that any child should know that they are unconditionally loved and supported. The parenting practices that are most important to my family are teaching discipline, independence, respect toward others, and above all, love. If I am blessed with children, I plan to emphasize the same parent practices and greatly enforce why it is important to be grateful and give back to others. My parents taught me these things through conversations, lectures, religion, and dinner together almost every night. I believe that in order for a child to not only hear, but listen to what a parent is teaching, it requires a type of bond that a child and parent begin to develop during pregnancy and after the birth. A child needs to feel that a parent will just simply be there whether it’s because they need their diaper changed when they are 6 months old or because they need advice when they are a teenager.

            I do agree with the ideas found in attachment parenting, but only to a certain extent. Divecha (2018) states that “Attachment parenting advises emotional responsiveness…but well-meaning parents can overdo it, believing they need to meet every child’s request, which can be exhausting and counterproductive.” I believe that parents should be comforting to the child when they are upset, for example when they are crying to indicate that they are hungry or tired. But when it comes to the child crying because they are not getting what they want or they want more candy for example, parents should not cater to them in this way to make them stop crying. Although I would like to try to bond with my child through “breastfeeding, baby-wearing, bedding close to the baby…” (Divecha, 2018), if that does not happen, there are other ways to have a child develop a secure attachment.

            Attachment parenting refers to a “parenting approach that emphasizes responding sensitively to the needs of babies and children” (Divecha, 2018) that is believed to pave the way for a child to develop secure attachment. Although I was breastfed, I slept in the same bed as my mother as an infant and if I was crying, she has told me that if she knew I was fed, rested and my diaper was changed, if I was still crying she was not always able to make it stop due to her busy work schedule. When I asked my parents if they think they practiced attachment parenting, they said no and through the survey I took about my attachment style, my results tell me that I have a secure attachment with the close people in my life.

            My assumptions about the best parenting practices can be different from other families and cultures because they may not have the same beliefs or views that I do on specific things, such as religion, or how that religion is enforced, bedtime, meals, eating together as a family, etc. Carr (2019) elaborates that “Anthropologist Courtney Meehan’s work with the Aka, a Congo Basin tropical forest foraging community, revealed that infants have about 20 caregivers interacting and caring for them on a daily basis.” A Cameroonian Nso Community of mother’s also expressed that they prefer their child to be taken care by several people to have close bonds with them instead of only a close bond with the mother. Personally, if I have children, I would only want them to be taken care by me, their father or maybe one or two family members. I think this way because I feel that if something were to happen to my child under someone else’s supervision, whether that be a hard fall or a broken shoulder, I would be very upset. Regardless of the parenting style, I believe it should be the goal of every parent to create a healthy and loving environment for the child for a better chance of secure attachment.