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Thesis statements
QUESTION
Step One:
First, review the following guide (Links to an external site.) on what traits make a solid thesis statement.
Step Two:
Look at the following 3 thesis statements. Each is not an effective thesis argument because they’re weak in one of more of the areas listed in the above article (either they are not Debatable, Assertive, Reasonable, Evidence-Based, or Focused).
Thesis statements:
Energy consumption in the United States is out of control.
Cats are superior to dogs in most people’s views.
The office of the President cannot be charged with crimes because of the law.
Step Three:In a new Word document, copy each of the thesis statements. Then write a paragraph on each noting which trait or traits are weak, and what should be changed or included to improve it. Remember that you must do this for each of the 3 thesis statements
Subject | Energy Sources | Pages | 3 | Style | APA |
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Answer
Energy consumption in the United States is out of control.
This thesis statement is not debatable. After all, most reasonable people would agree that the consumption of energy in the United States is out of control. Only few people people would disagree with this statement. Improving it would entail bringing in an aspect of how this uncontrollable consumption of energy would be controlled and whether this control would be a positive thing or not. The statement would read for example that “Following the energy consumption rates that have got out of control in the Unites States, the government should invest more in energy saving strategies.” This way, sensible people would debate it out (Lumen, n.d).
Cats are superior to dogs in most people’s views.
This statement is not assertive. A non-assertive statement fails to express the stance of the writer (Lumen, n.d). “In most people’s view” is vague and fails to capture any specific stance. To make this statement argumentative, it would be essential that the writer stamps their own views too. Saying “People ought to turn more to keeping cats because the cost of keeping them is lower compared to dogs” is argumentative because it encourages pet lovers to turn more to cats because of the differences in costs.
The office of the President cannot be charged with crimes because of the law.
This thesis statement is neither focused nor assertive. This statement is too general because we are not sure which individuals are specifically referred to by “The office of the President”. It is also not clear which particular law is referred to in this case. Both instances would call for too much evidence to support the claims. The position asserted is therefore weak and not assertive. One way of making this statement better would be to say for instance that “The US penal code should exempt the President from criminal prosecution because doing so would derail effective service delivery and upholding of the oath of office.”
References
Lumen (n.d). Argumentative Thesis Statements. https://courses.lumenlearning.com/wm-writingskillslab/chapter/argumentative-thesis-statements/
Appendix
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