Effective Family Communication

Answer

Effective Family Communication

Description

I was invited to visit a friend I had made at workplace years back. She invited me to stay for a week with her family. She and her husband Peter, their three children, Ann 15, Josh 13, and Tim 10 live in a five-bedroom flat in Hannover, Germany. I was meeting her family so closely for the first time. I was warmly welcomed and the reception was great. As the days went by, I noticed that the family did not function as a unit, they never communicated respectfully with each other and they always argued on issues. The parents never had any constructive interaction nor communication with themselves and with the children. The family atmosphere was always tensed with parents loud on the children imposing their opinions on them, and the children were defending themselves in equally loud voices. The only time there was peace in the room was when each person was engaged in individual activity like playing computer games, watching TV, or talking on the phone. There were no family pass time activities like watching films together and no conversation on family issues among them. I did not speak about my observation because it would look like I am intruding into their family life.

Feeling

Before the incidence, I felt happy about the family, I admired how the it was growing very fast. I was also happy about the warm reception. However, after observing recurring poor communication skills which led to daily quarrels among the parents as well as the kids, I felt bad and pitied them. I did not expect parents to be so hard on their children until there is no sign of happiness in the house. I felt discouraged about having a family. Generally, I was disappointed.

Evaluation

The only positive thing about the situation is having a big family and warm reception. However, there is nothing interesting in a big family where happiness does not prevail. Everything went wrong in the situation. Although it is common that couples do have disagreements at times, it is quite unfortunate that those quarrels occur every time and they are extended to the kids, who I believe are innocent. The only time when people are quiet in the house is when everybody is busy with personal things such as phones and computer games. In addition, there is no family time where people can watch a movie and converse together. This has brought disconnect among the couples as far love is concerned.  I could not do anything since I would be seen as an intruder to some people’s affairs.

Analysis

One important issues that I have learned from the situation is the importance of family communication. According to Waisbord (2018), communication within the family is tremendously significant since it enables members of the family to express their wants, needs, and concerns to each other. Honest and open communication generates an atmosphere which allows individuals to express differences as well as admiration and love for each other. According to Hargie (2016) it is through effective communication that members can resolve the unescapable issues which arise in families. One of the communication theories that explain this situation is relational dialectics theory. This is an interpersonal communication theory that explains patterns of communication which arise between members when they maintain a good relationship. The theory focuses on struggles and tensions in relationships (Baxter & Norwood, 2015, p. 32). It asserts that with no proper communication, a family tends to remain disjointed since there is now way a joyous moment or activity can be shared. In that regard, every individual remains focused on personal activities with less interest on other people’s welfare.

Conclusion

The situation which is characterized by constant quarreling led to poor relationship between the couples themselves and the children. There is no happiness in the family as every individual including the children are focused on own activities. If it happens that I get myself in a similar situation, I would act differently. Instead of listening like I did, I will let the parents know that whatever they are doing is not good for any family and is likely to brake them. In this case, I would like to develop strong communication skills to convince them that their actions are bad.

Action Plan

Since I will not keep quiet when things go bad, one of the action I plan to do is to do research on effective communication skills so that in future I will not only have the expertise but also the courage to face such individuals. Secondly, I plan to introduce the family in interactive sessions such as watching movies together may be once in a week so that they can realize the importance interacting and communicating as family.